I Love You To The Moon And Back

I’m sitting here in Kaiser waiting for my 6 year old son to finish talking to his counselor about his daily struggles as a kid with autism (Aspergers specifically). I’ve also just been told that this is our last appointment so now he will have no therapy unless I choose to pay for it. And I  just had to make an appointment for my 8 year old daughter with another Psychologist to address her high anxiety levels (which are, in part, due to the constant need to deal with her brother). I’m almost in tears as I sit here. Ah strike that, now I am in tears. I’m trying to “put things into perspective” and remember that compared to others I really don’t have that much to worry about.  Little Malena in my post “The Little Girl With The Big Wheels” is a prime example. But the hurt doesn’t go away no matter how many “perspectives” I try to have.  As a parent, seeing my children struggle, to put it plainly, really freaking sucks. I get sad, then angry, then on fire to do whatever I can for them, then I dispair if it doesn’t work. And it becomes a vicious cycle until I remember something my mom always told me, “Give it up to God – he will never give you more than you can handle.” and that finally brings me peace. Maybe tonight when I read our traditional Goodnight Moon and I say  “I Love You To The Moon And Back” I’ll also teach my children the same lesson my mom taught me Give it up to God  -he will never give you more than you can handle and pray for peace.

6 thoughts on “I Love You To The Moon And Back

  1. I wish I could be there and give you a big hug. You are walking through your own “trial by fire” right now and this too shall pass. It’s only natural you’d feel this way – your children know you remarkable heart even though you may feel what you are doing is not nearly enough. Your children will surprise you in their level of understanding that you won’t anticipate.

    Always close with love,

    Nina

    1. Thank you Nina. I big hug you back! I’m not sure why it got to me today but it did.Thank you for your support xoxox Love to Mauro & Malena

  2. Those times in my life when I’ve reached the end of my rope I just remember Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane when he says “…..not my will but thine be done”. Total surrender to God’s will and trusting him to see me through always brings me peace. I’ll say a prayer for you and your family tonight and may God bless you for being such a devoted mom!

    1. Thank you- I will meditate on Jesus in the garden tonight when I say the rosary and think of what you have said. God bless you!

  3. I just figured out that I have to include my name after every post LOL! I have been posting since yesterday under Kevin C. Denman and Anonymous. Thanks for the chance to share my faith and your journey!

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